On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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