remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
