There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
vagina is talking i cant
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
