is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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