nut hugger
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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