so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize