All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
