"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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