I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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