i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
