a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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