The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize