This is not my ceiling
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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