I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
