i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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