if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
