You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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