I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
