oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Randomize
