An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Randomize
