Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
