Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
