how can u be prego again
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
