I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize