Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize