my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Please don't give away my fajitas
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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