You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize