I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
