Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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