The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
