you're like a bully in the Christmas story
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
