whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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