Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
