Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
where does the pee come out of this thing
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
