Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize