Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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