Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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