just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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