With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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