I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I am full of burrito and curiosity
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
