Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
