Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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