D3 body, D1 cock
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize