i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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