do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
