You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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