Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
