just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
