can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize