Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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