This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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