This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
